Shoulda, woulda, coulda

There are four words or expressions that send me into orbit. I'll bet you agree. They are:
1. WHY didn't you .............?
2. You SHOULD .................
3. Here's what you NEED to do.
4. IF I had...............
When used under certain sets of circumstances these four unfinished sentences can make me spontaneously combust. It's not because I'm a sensitive shrinking violet. In fact, it's quite the opposite. We are all guilty of this at one time or another but that doesn't make it less annoying.
First off, if I don't ask what I SHOULD do, I probably don't want your input. Let's say it's cold outside and I'm barefoot. I know I SHOULD put on shoes but if you aren't my Mama, mind your own business. Maybe I like the way the cold grass tickles my toes.
In that same vein, if I'm barefoot outside and I step on a bee or a sticker, don't ask me WHY I didn't have on my shoes. I just didn't, okay? I made the decision to go shoeless and now I'll pay the consequences. You asking me WHY won't change anything.
Don't tell me what I NEED to do, about anything! I probably know that I NEED to do whatever it is, but don't want to. If it isn't threatening my health or yours don't worry about it. Even little kids know what things they NEED to do to survive. A mature adult with many life experiences doesn't want to hear, "You really NEED to drink the spring water from the fountain downtown." This might be true and I might come to that conclusion on my own, but in the mean time, leave it alone.
Then there is IF. I do not like the word IF. Those two little letters can and have toppled governments and families. IF I had bet on horse A instead of horse B I wouldn't have lost the money. IF I hadn't lost I would have won. IF I hadn't changed my bet I would be rich.
On the other hand, IF is an important word, a word that alerts us to consequences. "IF I don't get to the airport I'll miss the plane." "IF I walk into moving traffic I will be killed by a speeding motorist."
Listen to yourself. Try not to be one of the "shoulda, woulda, coulda people."